At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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