if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
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