Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
