Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize