I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
