Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
