And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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