Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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