I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
