are you still at the devil's house?
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize