Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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