Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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