is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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