Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
