then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
