it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
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