you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
