NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
worst night to have a conscience
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Randomize
