We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
