I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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