yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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