remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Im just a social blackout drinker.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
