Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize