Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
