is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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