why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
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