Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
