you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Floor bacon is actually really good
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
