My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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