Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Text me some of your sweat
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
