so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
My breath smells like gin and sadness
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
