I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
