Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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