Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize