if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
You've changed since you got that strap on
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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