Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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