i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
