I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
