Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
