I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
