So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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