You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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