at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize