I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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