problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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