guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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