just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I am available for nakedness
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
