Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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