All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
