I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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